Wednesday, March 2, 2011

Just Checking In.

I've been closed off for the last few days because I haven't wanted to face any pain or face what I'm feeling. Monday, we lost Moose. I know he was old and I knew it was coming, but it still felt so sudden because he went from wagging his tail and acting fine to downhill in the time span of one day. I miss both of my dogs. Fly has been gone for 5 months on March 6th and it still feels like yesterday. It has left a huge gap in the house having only the little dogs around now. I just really hate death and I don't see it getting any easier in life. It's really difficult to be okay with it when you don't believe in God because there is so much more uncertainty about what happens when we die. I would like to hope that it's more then just nothing but either way I am struggling to find any sense of comfort. There is nothing I can do to fix this and only time will dull it.. but it really just sucks.

School has been so long this week. I have a hellish exam coming up on Friday that I need to spend the next two days really studying for or it is not going to be an enjoyable experience. Next week, I finally don't have any exams. So I am just going to spend it working really hard to get caught up on homework as much as possible because the week after is spring break. :) I have a lot of big presentations coming so hopefully I can put a lot of work in this weekend and next week so that spring break isn't just full of homework. I can't wait for this semester to be over because with all of my body issues it's been nothing but stress, unfortunately. I am just exhausted.

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